Sleepless Nights

Today, a parenting thought that many can probably relate to, although I hope not!

Bleary eyed after a rather exhausting night, this morning I grabbed my Bible and took a puzzled look at Psalm 3, verse 5 this morning. “I lie down and sleep; I wake again, for the Lord sustains me.” Hmm. I need to meditate on this verse a bit. See what is in here, as I feel like I am missing a point, maybe THE point.

OK, Lord, I understand the “wake again” part well enough. Last night ranked in the bottom third of my “restful evenings” rankings. Every two hours, nearly to the minute, we were awakened by our two year old. Usually he would cry out, and by the sounds he emitted we knew he was not merely stirring, he was awake. One of us would slide out of bed, go into his room and, sure enough, find him sitting up crying at the walls.

Like first-time parents of a newborn, throughout the night we found ourselves drifting off, only to be roused from any semblance of slumber by this poor boy’s tossing and turning.

This is different than a new baby’s schedule. First, Little Man is louder. Second, he is not easily sidetracked and will, sooner rather than later, turn the frustration or disappointment into a full-force rant. Third, eventually he will leave the bed for the floor, or for outside the door. So, “ignore him we cannot,” as Yoda might put it. “Demands attention he does.”

Now, we’re experienced parents. We do have five other children who have passecd through this type of sleepless phase in life. And so, we have put our hard-earned knowledge to work on this matter.

We’ve tried variations in his food intake prior to bedtime. This or that medication, or none at all (we’re told melatonin can help, but it has no appreciable effect upon the nighttime experience). Have him active before bedtime, trying to wear him out. Have him calm before bedtime. All of the routines have been considered, scrutinized, changed, noted. We’ve tried it all, hoping for a difference, only to be awakened throughout the night. Every night. Two months now. We are feeling old…yikes, we are tired!

And the questions keep coming up. What is keeping him from good sleep?

What is awakening him from much needed nighttime rest?

Why can’t Little Man go to bed and stay there on any semblance of a schedule?

Hat are we doing wrong? What can we do differently to help him sleep? To help US sleep?

Why don’t you listen, God, to our prayers for rest?

Well, it is apparent that there are no answers right now, only this little Russian puzzle whom we love dearly. And we do. We’ve worked through any simmering anger at him – he is not trying to get up each night. He is not the enemy. We’ve got to shepherd him through this season, and try to get him to a point of through-the-night sleep and rest. In the meantime, we wait.

We’ll learn the key, sometime soon, I hope. Or perhaps he will simply start sleeping well again on his own.

Until then, sustain me, Oh Lord. Thinking back to that psalm, I am not sure You and I agree about what “sustain” means, but help me accept YOUR definition. For now, please sustain me.